"FIRE ZE LAZER!!!!"

Radiation Treatment.

I'm undergoing radiation treatment five days a week (Monday to Friday) concurrent with chemotherapy for five weeks.  It's actually good news because I was told initially it would be six weeks but the fact is it's five weeks.  I've done 1.4 weeks already.  I can't wait for the end.

I get my radiation at the Ottawa General Hospital and I have to show up daily for my pre-scheduled appointment.  So far, my appointments are all over the map.  My dream of having morning sessions and going to work right after fell off the page when I got my first radiation dose after my first chemo.  I couldn't get out of bed without feeling like barfing.

The last few days, however, have been better.  The queasiness has subsided so I'll take that as a good day.

The Radiation machine and bed that I lie face down on.  As soon as I see this bed, I drop my pants.  Underwear follows.  Dignity is left at the entry door to the hospital.

The radiation appointments have been going well so far, now that I've been properly set up.  Before radiation and chemo began, I had a CT scan of my pelvis which, of course, involved hoses and fluids going into some unmentionable part of my body (not the ears) and then the technicians gave me some tattoos as a benchmark on the sides of my ass and on the back of my ass up high.  These tattoos are, well, tattoos.  They're permanent.  Small dots, really.  This is required for the technicians to line up the radiation beam so a dose will hit the required area at the desired angles.




Radiation beams come from the middle of this black thingy.




Targetting on my pillow.  Insert backside here.

 My first session last week was not 15 minutes.  It was 3.5 hours.  Basically, they weren't happy with the small dots I got tattooed on my ass.  In the end, they did it properly and remarked me.  They didn't mess around and got out the green Sharpie marker and put new targets on my ass.  It's just a Sharpie so they covered them in waterproof tape.  Now, they're satisfied with the marks and all is going well.  The techs are able to set me up properly and easily once I lower my underwear.  The sessions are only taking about 15 minutes each.



New target marks on my backside to replace
small tattoo dots.  I'll keep my pants raised
when around the rifle ranges...

 I think the radiation is working.  In fact, I know it is.  I don't know how this stuff was discovered but I like it.  I don't feel any burning or any changes for my 3 straight minutes of beam zapping but within about an hour after the treatment, I need to nap.  And I sleep like the dead.

One of my problems last year before I knew I had cancer was I was constipated.  The constipation started January 2011.  Then some bleeding followed.  A month or two later I was really agitated with this so I went to an Urgent Care clinic.  I was misdiagnosed.  I was told I had hemorrhoids.  I had to look them up to see what the heck that was.

In the summer that followed, the agitation did not suppress, and, despite blowing my brains out on bran, the constipation only worsened.  My wife scheduled a colonoscopy for me.

In November 2011, by some strange turn of events, we had to drive 600 kms to Kitchener to get the goddamned colonoscopy.  I'm glad we did.  The waiting would soon be over to see why these hemorrhoids were such a pain.

The doctor who performed the scope was very bothered by what he saw and feared cancer. 

In the weeks that followed, more testing ensued and then a formal diagnosis.  I've been diagnosed with Stage 3 Colorectal Cancer.  I've been told I will lose my sphincter muscle and, as a result, my asshole.  Hmm...I'm kindof attached to that...

That was around the time the pain started.  The Kitchener doctor was suprised I wasn't in pain already but within a week or two, the pain started.  I was still constipated but now it was clear as to why---there was a tumour at the exit door and it was blocking the escape.  Ain't no one was getting out.

Many times a day I would visit the bathroom and have the smallest of bowel movements.  It was painful.  It felt like shitting a pine cone.  And the pain continued after that the rest of the day until the next attempt.  It felt like, well, I just shat a pine cone.  That continued until the radiation last week.

I'd say on Day 3 of radiation, I started to have pain-free bowel movements.  The next day, I was on the pills and got rid of the bottle and PICC line.  Things were good. 

I asked the radiation doctor today why the lack of pain and he explained that the tumour likely was shrinking.  Likely because he wasn't checking.  If it was gone entirely, I was still getting five weeks of radiation to ensure cancer-free as much as possible.  95% of the patients respond best to this dose of radiation for my situation so that's what they're doing.

As the radiation doctor, Dr. Kendall, terms it, they're frying my ass.  He was happy that my ass hasn't felt like it's on fire yet but it might in a few days.  Great.

I do this for the full five weeks and then I rest for 6 to 8 weeks before surgery.  As Dr. Kendall says, in that time, I'm still cooking.  Hmm...nice thought.  I hope I can walk...

At any rate, I don't know how many doctors died on the way to discovering the radiation treatments but they seem to be working.  The dream is miracles will happen during chemo and radiation and the course of surgery in April will be steered towards a sphincter-saving solution.